Relax. Relax? Who? When? How?
Hi Sarah. Thanks so much for letting me stop by today as part of the Perpetual Light Blog Tour.
As anyone who’s ever released their first book knows it’s a little bit stressful. There are so many things to worry about. Let me list a few because they’re amazingly fresh in mind!
Am I doing enough promo? Are the dates of everything lining up? What if something happens and the book doesn’t really release? What if the book releases and that’s when I find out it’s terrible? What if my mom hates it? What if someone asks me to do a reading? In public? What if no one, not even my mom buys the book? Why would she buy the book? I’m giving her a copy! Oh, God, no one is going to buy this book!
What in God’s name was I thinking? Publish a book? Have I lost my damn mind?
Yes, that’s what February 20, 2012 was like for me. It was the start of this blog tour and I was ever so slightly nervous. And who heard about it? My sister- via text message. The poor woman only wanted to know how I was. Have you ever received a novel-length text message? Well, that wasn’t the first she’d received, and I’ll bet it won’t be her last!
My husband called at lunchtime as he does everyday, and I unloaded on him because now I was several hours into a worrying fit and had not managed to do any new writing. It was a short conversation during which he told me not to worry, everything would work out fine and then asked what was for dinner.
My sister-in-law called around 4 PM, and by now I’d convinced myself I should jump from the second floor window. She was very clear on that idea being the worst I’d had. Then said all the things a good sister and friend says about how the book would be a huge success and I’d come so far and I shouldn’t try to write my other book today. I should focus on my blog posts and enjoy the moment.
It helped. I didn’t jump. But I didn’t relax. It took about 24 hours for me to finally come down out of the stratosphere and rejoin the world. In that period of time I tried a number of things to relax. I hit the treadmill, twice. Didn’t help, though I do love to blast my music when I workout. I ate chocolate. Lots of chocolate. Chocolate covered pretzels. Chocolate covered cherries. Chocolate covered coffee beans. Red velvet tea. Oven roasted dark chocolate almonds. (Thank God for that treadmill!) I tried to read another Mary Janice Davidson Undead story. Got four pages in and began wondering if I’d be as successful as Mary Janice and then stopped reading.
To say I’d worked myself up is an understatement, though that kind of energy does get things done- laundry, bathrooms, ovens, dinner. Of course, that was all done by 9:30 in the morning along with one trip on the treadmill.
I finally managed to relax the following evening. I’m not sure if it was just time to let go and relax or if my little friend just knew what he needed to do. But around 8:30 Dino, our very lovable black Labrador followed me everywhere I went until I finally got the hint. He wanted to cuddle. He’s so cute. He grabbed one of his many stuffed babies and came running over. He’s about 70 pounds but he likes to lay in my lap and hold his baby. And that just did it. Put everything back on track. I love that dog!
My grandfather always said, “Worry about nothing, Dolly. It all works out.” And he was right. My posts are all off and done. My book is released on time. And I’ve sold some copies. I will get reviews- good and bad. And that’s just life. Everything always works out.
What do you do when worrying seems to be getting the best of you? Feel free to share some strategies. I can always use new ideas!
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Internal vs. External Conflict
4 weeks ago